Post op

I woke up the next day sure that this was all very bad dream.  It wasn't.  I so wished that it was.  Today I have to start dealing with it.  So lets Start dealing with it.  I can barely move.  It hurts to move anything.  I can't get up by my self or do anything by myself.  This is going to be harder than I thought. 

What I need to remember is that this is all from the surgery not the disease.  Dr. told me that I am "Optimally De bulked"  that means that they got it all.  I have to remember that.  It is hard.  He took everything out,  The uterus, ovaries and the lymph nodes.  I just have to wait 2 weeks to find out the staging.  But remember most woman come out at stage 3.  Not much to look forward to. 

The PA came in every day.  She was always nice and answered all my questions.  I just have to heal now. The rest will come after.  The Staging, The Chemo,The hair falling out, The new port . . . .

I need to have goals.

One goal at a time. 

Lets make the first goal to get out of the Hospital. 

Lots of people came to see me.  Lots of flowers came.  Lots of phone calls.  All were very nice and very appreciated.  I don't want there to be a reason for flowers and phone calls and visits.  I don't want to have cancer! I just want to go home.  I have to work towards that.  Maybe by Friday. 

Now it seams that I have some sort of an infection.  I have a fever, my heart rate is up to high.  My first goal is going to be harder than I thought too.  My temp and heart rate have to be normal for 24 hours before I can go home.   I can't seem to eat anything either.  My digestive tract is still sleeping.  Lots of antibiotics.  I think three bags a day.  maybe more, I'm not sure. 

OK, by Thursday my temp is down and my heart rate is better.  Friday may work out.  Now my epidural comes out, the Lovenox shots start, the Foley comes out and I have to start walking to the bathroom.  Again, harder than I thought.  I can't do it alone.  I am a pretty independent woman, but there is nothing I can do on my own.  This is going to take some getting used to. 

Friday they said I could go home.  I still haven't pooped, but they said that was OK.  I am so glad that I reached my first goal.  There are so many more to reach. . . .